As much as I want to continue to lie to myself and say that I’m okay, I know that I’m not. Talking to him, man talking to him just brightens me up like nothing else can. I catch myself telling him things I can’t tell anyone else, that man brings out the best in me and I finally realized the cold hard truth. I am always going to love him, he was my first love, my first real boyfriend, the guy who set my expectations so high for everyone after him. He was the guy who put me on a pedestal and made me realize how much I was actually worth. He was, is and will always will be my best friend. I can pretend that I hate him and that I don’t miss him, but I’d just be lying to myself. I miss him all the time, I would say everyday but I’d be lying, sometimes I don’t think about him. When I do think about him though it hits me like a ton of bricks. When something important in my life happens to this day he is still the first person I want to run to and talk about it with. He was my person, he was that person who always brought out the best in me. Now years later I wish that we would’ve kept our relationship alive because I do miss him. No matter what he does I am always proud of him, I am forever unconditionally his #1 fan. No one else is ever going to come close to sharing such an amazing love like the one he and I had. Down the road maybe I’ll fall in love again, but it’ll be different and it’ll be special in its own way. For now, all I know is that my bub is my favorite person ever since I met him. I will always love him and look out for him no matter where life takes us.


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